One of the ladies at my work mentioned that her dad was in the hospital with signs of cancer. He has gone through so much chemo that it burned his vocal chords. Well, I couldn't shake the fact that I was supposed to go see him in the hospital. You know, when you work at a church and are in the ministry...hospital visits some how become an obligation. I wanted to go just to be a good person. Well, if your like me you say "Hey I am gonna go see your dad" then you just put it in the back of your head.
The other day, I left work and took a wrong turn. I drove for awhile and believe it or not... I ended up in the parking lot of the hospital. I knew what I was supposed to do.
I went upstairs and walked in to the room. As soon as I walked in... something began to happen. I looked at a 87 year old man who has been cooked by chemo, his cute little wife and sister in law. Seeing as they don't know me whatsoever, they began to talk to me as if I was apart of the family. I sat there and went with the intention of encouraging him and telling him not to give up. That's when it started.
I sat down and started the normal "how are you's" and what not and he wasn't having it. He lifted his arm, pointed his finger and said "you sir need to hear me". His hand started shaking from a lack of strength and his voice scratching from all the radiation... "you are in a holding pattern. God has his hand on your life and is in control. Don't you quit" He doesn't know me at all. He began to tell me that there was something special about me. How important it is to fix people and love on the hurting. How He could see God's hand on my life and how he can see in my eyes I am tired... but I can make it. This went on for 45 minutes. I just sat there and listened holding back emotion. He handed me a book titled "When God Winks At You" (when God confirms destiny through coincidence)
I sat in a stunned holiness. I prayed for him and his wife asked me to please come back. He gave me his cell phone number and demanded I call him. Understand. His knees look like basketballs due to arthritis from years of laying carpet, his skin and insides burned from radiation, his voice gone from a singed vocal chord. Every 10 or 15 words he had to stop and cough and clear his throat because of the damage but he wouldn't stop... and God spoke through him to get to me.
I sat in my car and wept. I cried for sometime. I came home and tried to tell April and broke down again. I guess what I am trying to tell you is... we need to understand... God will find you and talk to you... when you need it. Be encouraged and take it from one who is on the threshold of a whole new life. Stop whining and keep your chin up. Keep going and do what you know and feel what you are supposed to do. Bottom line? God is there so shut up, put up, and give up.